july 24, 2001 //not myself today//
something about riding on a train and looking out the window and seeing graffitti
on the walls of apartment complexes by the track passing me by makes me feel melancholy.
now i'm sitting in a cafe and is all of sudden wishing for domestic bliss--
a cozy house with 5 big dogs (and coco) running around in the backyard,
painting and pottery on saturdays and long sunday afternoons of me + boy in our pajamas
with books, tea and lots of sunlight, feeling content and at home.
what the fuck
my dissatisfaction with my current situation wreaks havoc on my relationship with those close to me.
currently i'm feeling discontent, pondering how insidious and unhealthy that particular emotion is...
and wishing this woman sitting at the table next to me (apparently
from itvs) would stop her incessant talking.
* preacher by Garth Ennis and Steve Dillon
it's so addicting i can't stop reading it. despite the fact that it's laden with machismo, nationalism, (white)
american masculinity, gore, sex and violence, i've gone through 2 volumes like it was nothing.
2 down, 7 more to go. lucky for me, niem has all 9! it made my day.
* pillow case skirt